My Pleasure Comes From Providing My Wife’s Pleasure

I am 56 years old, live in Phoenix, Arizona and I am a business owner and leader of a financial services company that has about 75 employees. I believe that I am among the group of otherwise “alpha” males that are in-charge through almost every aspect of his life, except of course my marriage to my Wife. Things I enjoy are fishing, baseball and other outdoor activities with my teenage sons and my friends. I have a great relationship with all four of my children,  two of which are all grown up. I am 12 years older than my beautiful wife. When we married, I was the absolute alpha, loving leader in our relationship. About 4 to 5 years ago, I asked her to join me in a Female Led Marriage. She agreed to do so …. *smile*

My wife and I have always gotten along amazingly. Roughly 10 years into our loving marriage she made an off-handed comment about wondering whether or not we would have anything in common once the children left the nest. That starting me on a path to figure out the best way not to let that happen. Not to let two people that love and care for each other, suddenly find themselves feeling like strangers. I began researching and discovered the relationship benefits of a Female Led Marriage. I mustered up the courage and asked my wife to become my Goddess. Since then, our love is deep, our marriage is stronger and our future is bright.

Our Female Led Marriage has absolutely and genuinely allowed me to be able to focus all (OK, most) of my energy to providing the pleasures in life, not just sexually, to my Wife. I truly and genuinely do receive a large percentage of my pleasure from providing and witnessing my Wife’s pleasure.

We have small, otherwise barely significant rituals that I must always adhere to, without being asked or told. I must have her coffee prepared for her every morning when she wakes up. Dishes …. if it a dish and it needs to be washed anywhere in the house, that is my responsibility, again without being asked or told. The understanding and comfort that comes from knowing she is automatically attended to in these small ways and others is general pleasure for her, but provides a continuous source of pleasure for me.

At various times and whenever the mood strikes her, she will have me massage a part of her that is aching. Full body massages are also something she knows is at her beck and call.

My wife has little or no interest in attaining the porn-like depiction of the kind of lifestyle a Mistress Wife would lead. She enjoys being the mother of our children and attending to them in traditional motherly ways (meal preparation, laundry, keeping he house clean). After I offered my devotion to her, and asked her to lead our marriage, we talked very carefully about what we hoped to achieve. Neither of us had an interest in turning our marriage, family, standing in the community on it’s head in dramatic fashion. She made it clear that being the one in the house that provides the love and attention that a “typical” wife and mother would provide is what she wants. To take those things away from here so she could sit on the couch and read a book, or take tennis lessons, or go find another lover while her husband attended to the house matters, had zero appeal to her. That being said, she gets a great deal of pleasure in knowing that she alone can decide, at any given moment, what gets done by and by whom, without an ounce of debate or defiance.

I’d say her biggest source of pleasure lies in the knowledge that she is indeed a Queen in her realm, and has at her disposal a genuinely loving, completely dutiful, willing subject in her viral, masculine, strong and protective king.  He is a king that is alpha in every other aspect of his life. A leader of men and women. A business owner. A mentor to many and a leader to most. An icon in the community … strong, intelligent and honor filled. To know that she essentially owns that king, is a strong and constant source of pleasure for her.

I will do most things that society believes a true gentleman should do. I open car doors for her and if you were to observe us you’d know that this is done with intent and with service in mind. My wife will walk to the passenger side of the car and if she arrives a few seconds before I do, she will demurely stand and look at the door, knowing that I will be there to open it for her. Can she open her doors without any trouble? Of course she can, but that isn’t the point. It is a matter of respect for me to be expected to open (any) doors for her. As such, it is also a subtle way for us to perhaps demonstrate to each other and the world, who is in charge of our relationship. The beautiful woman is naturally always treated well because the man that loves her genuinely gets pleasure from seeing her pampered, attended to and loved. That little smile of blissful contentment is as powerful as any drug.

Our Female Led Marriage is a private matter. Only one other person (her very best friend) knows of some of the intimate details of our lifestyle. It appears to the outside world that I am the alpha dog, I suppose on par with your typical husband in a typical marriage where you can see the love is there, but hardly ever is demonstrated. In this context, I will declare for everyone to hear how beautiful I think she is, or I will openly address her as “babydoll” or some similar loving word. During times when we are together with couple friends and others but not next to each other, I habitually make it a point to go to her, kiss her on the lips loving but not like a horny teenager, look her in the eye and smile before walking away. Of course it makes her happy to have her friends tell her how lucky she is to have her husband dote on her like he is still courting her …. which at the end of the day, he is still courting her. He is constantly courting her.

The biggest benefit for me has been the wonderful, almost constant state of desire I have for her. As a result of our love for each other, my constant state of desire and my requirement to demonstrate my affection for her any time I feel it, our friends have all noticed that open affection. Many of her contemporaries have commented to her about wonderfully it is that I am dutiful and affectionate toward her in public, and that they wished their husbands would “learn” from me in that regard. We make little innuendos and jokes about the ramifications for me should there be a lack of affection that go under their radar, but my Wife and I know that it is true. I am proud whenever she tells me about a friend of hers that compliments us on our obvious affection for each other.

My Wife has an incredible amount of street smarts. As such, throughout her entire life she has used those skills to navigate around/over/through things in order to obtain the things/way of life she wanted. Once she became comfortable with the knowledge that she could indeed be in control of that path, without unnecessary manipulation, her cleverness and craftiness took over and led her down the path to continued growing happiness in her life.

My advice would be to AVOID AT ALL COSTS seeking some sort of set-of-rules by others, that you may think you have to abide by in order to have a Loving FLR. It seems that most people seeking advice tend to think they need to start a conversation with “Do people usually …. ?” I wish someone would’ve told me that it doesn’t matter what most people do. Figuring out what makes her happy and making sure you keep doing it is what really matters.