9 Signs You Are In an Abusive Relationship

It needs to be said. The opposite of a Loving Female Led Relationship is an abusive relationship. Many women are in relationships with men who have expressed that they want a Loving FLR but they are really creating an abusive situation for the woman.

The women who are aligned with these type of men feel that they just need to be stronger and more forceful and then the man would respect them. The truth is, if you have to be forceful with your partner in order to get him to respect your wishes then he is manipulating you into serving his need to be dominated and he is not the one for you. You can continue to try to prove your worth to him and to try to convince him to respect you but as long  as you feel that you have to work for his respect, you won’t get it.

In a Loving Female Led Relationship respect for your desires is given willingly. The man in a Loving FLR does not desire to add pressure to your life; he is there to be a source of relief.

Here are a few other signs that you are likely involved in an abusive relationship instead of a Loving FLR.

Ignores you when you express that something is important to you.
A Gentleman will always give a lady her way when she openly expresses that the decision is important to her. If he argues or tries to convince you that your choice is wrong (when the choice does not immediately compromise his core values) then he is not honoring your choices and he does not respect you at all.

Ignores your requests for help.
When your progress and happiness is at stake, a Gentleman in a Loving FLR makes it a priority to see that you are positioned for success. An abusive man will ignore your requests for help or dismiss your concerns as frivolous.

Stops speaking to you.
In a Loving FLR there should be few, if any, disagreements since the mere nature of this relationship type supports honoring the woman’s choices. If there is a disagreement a Gentleman wants to talk it out as soon as possible because he can not bear to see the woman in his life upset. An abusive man will stop speaking to you until you come to him to iron things out. He wants you to beg for his attention and approval.

Cheats on you and blames you.
If you have decided that you want a monogamous relationship and you have expressed this to your partner there should be no way that he is seeing other women. The agreement to being in a Loving FLR is set upon the foundation of ensuring that the woman is happy at all times. If for some reason you find that your partner has cheated on you and instead of attempting to make things right, he blames you for his cheating, perhaps saying that you aren’t forceful enough or too busy, you are in an abusive relationship.

Blames you for the problems.
When things go wrong a Loving FLR is the perfect relationship style because the couple decides how to handle disagreements before they happen which results in fewer disagreements. If there is ever an issue where a decision you made leads to an unfortunate circumstance and he places the blame on you for the situation, you are in an abusive relationship. A Gentleman in a Loving FLR offers solutions, he doesn’t place blame.

Is physically violent.
A man who pushes, punches, slaps or even threatens violence is a man you should get away from without hesitation but don’t forget that a man who punches or throws things, even if it does not hit you, is also an abuser. Drop everything and run at the first sign of this behavior.

Calls you insulting names.
A Gentleman in a Loving FLR aims to uplift and support you. He would never call you a bitch or any other insulting name unless you request it. If he intentionally insults you then you are in an abusive relationship.

Criticizes your efforts.
Life is already difficult enough without having a romantic partner who criticizes everything you do. You are in an abusive relationship if you feel that you cannot be good enough in his eyes.

Intentionally upsets you so that you will punish him.
Some men crave drama more than women do. A man who will do the very thing you warned him not to do in order to test your limits and push you to punish him, yell at him or hit him is really a masochist who enjoys pain. He is an abuser who also likes to be abused. A woman in a Loving FLR avoids masochists at all costs because they do not know how to engage in a loving, pain free relationship.

If you realize that you are currently in an abusive relationship and you need emotional support as well as someone to help you create a plan to move forward, please join the women’s leadership coaching program or schedule a private meeting with me so that I can guide you.