Our Loving FLR Helped My Wife Tremendously

My wife and I live an older neighborhood of well manicured houses. The setting is private and we like it that way. My lovely wife and I spend a lot of time traveling and love road trips. My wife is the bread winner of the family and I take care of the house.

I asked my wife if she had ever heard of FLR. What did she say? She was not sure, not unhappy but confused. She was not sure why someone would like to be hurt. She was thinking of some leather clad dominatrix.

I had laid my cards on the table, I had to continue. I explained it was not like that and I wanted her to feel special, that I would do anything for her. I suggested we start small and that went well, she warmed up to me helping around the house and cooking. When did she really take full control? When I lost my job. I had more time and no reason not to take care of all domestic tasks. I started getting dinner ready by the time she got home and having a glass of wine ready for her. But I think it was the foot messages that she really enjoyed. She started asking and googling about FLR then.

The biggest thing that has changed because of our FLR is the relationship with my wife. We were good before but we are better now. I have such a deeper understanding of her now. We have a lot of very intimate moments and that brings out a lot of sharing. Not necessarily sexual moments but things like washing and drying her hair, shaving her legs, painting her nails and pampering. We talk and joke during these times, very personal times.

As far as the biggest benefit- the easing of frustrations. We have a regulated routine and find we have less ego and more time. The challenges are becoming set in our ways and the feeling of not being listened to (that’s my issue).

My wife is a very smart person but growing up she was always put down. Our Loving FLR helped my wife tremendously. First was the knowledge that someone was in her corner and second she realized she could be assertive. This is a good thing when someone has always felt hushed by authority figures.

I am a man who likes be behind the scenes. I think my wife has taken a liking to the spotlight. Much like of an ugly duckling story, she feels she has blossomed into a beautiful swan which totally works for me.

I make it seem it happened quickly but establishing our Loving FLR took a couple of years. First was the total rejection of her idea that this relationship was about hurting me. I proved to her that that was not the point. Communication and going slow are the way to go. I was hurt when I laid myself out and expressed what I wanted. I felt rejected when I did not happen right a way.

My advice to couples hoping to establish a Loving FLR is to keep an open mind and don’t shut down ideas. Listen to what she really wants, you may come to like the explanation.